A few years after I moved into HR, Martin – my then head of department – and I were talking, and I (as often was the case) was lamenting the slow pace of change in the function
(go ahead, you can call it whining if you like – I would, did and still do)
“I don’t know that corporate life will ever fit you, Vince…”
“I don’t know that corporate life will ever fit you, Vince…” Martin said.
He was right. And I agreed.
I was on the verge of going independent at the time – I hadn’t discussed it with anyone – though, ultimately, my move to the US would put a kink in that plan for almost a decade.
But the inevitable did eventually happen, and I stepped out on my own.
In retrospect, he was right. And I was right to agree.
But there was always something deeper in our discussions.
Because Martin knew that I wrote novels, that I played guitar, that I wrote songs, that I performed. Put bluntly, Martin knew that I have an artistic soul – and he was both supportive and wary of the presence of that soul in my work. Martin loved (many of) my ideas, but he was worried by my mercurial streak; enjoyed my leaps of imagination, but concerned that I might not follow through on longer term projects
(over time, he came to see that I always finished what I started])
There isn’t much space for an artistic soul in the corporate skeleton. And what little there is becomes compressed over time.
Be it the pressure of achieving objectives, the incessant need to compromise idealistic goals to move anything forward, the wariness (read fear) of the herd who sense something/someone different, the envy of people who just can’t see the things you see…
Be it any, all, or none of these things…
Over time, your true, shining, honest, audacious, visionary, epic self grows smaller and smaller, shoved into tighter corners and told to keep quiet.
Thankfully, I had advocates like Martin, Barry, Tanya and others to keep me safe and sane at key points – Tanya and I often talked each other down off the ledge – at other times I walked a very (VERY) lonely path.
And, the worst thing for me, there were times when the pain of being constantly diminished stopped me making the art that had always elevated me
(5 years’ block on writing a novel, for example)
times when corporate life made me feel that I was FUNDAMENTALLY wrong. That my identity was an error. That my only option was to erase my true nature.
Thankfully, I did not; I refused.
Thankfully, I had my genetics, upbringing and support of advocates (and one unnamed collaborator) to stand my ground, stand for what I believe in.
Novels, records, poetry and, yes, even business books all exist because I didn’t cave in.
And, along the way, I grew to understand something of my artistic soul – he didn’t seek catharsis, or pedestal-standing; he didn’t seek fame, fortune or notoriety… And, despite an amazing career, the last thing on his mind was to climb any ladders!
He simply wanted to heal people; to make people happy…
To make a difference for the better.
So, here I am doing just that and loving every minute.
Please don’t let your artistic soul be shoved in the corner by corporate life; don’t be silenced.
The world needs you to make a difference for the better; it always has.
And if that’s the risk you’re facing right now, let’s talk sooner rather than later.
Thank you for being here,
Vince