Instant millionaire!

Hit the big time!

Overnight sensation!

American Idol!

Oh, but this is a culture that loves to perpetuate the mythology of some destination that meets our heart’s every desire, while taking little to no effort, and relying upon the benevolent offerings of chance acquaintances.

It’s a seductive mythology – because it offers an immediate end to the frustrations we all feel in our day-to-day adaptations.

We whisper to ourselves the comforting mantra

If only… then I could…

and adapt ourselves to our current frustrations, because ‘if only’ seldom happens.

And because very few of us are likely to be the next youtube breakout sensation, or CEO of the hottest-internet-start-up-since…

[last week, it would seem]

we keep turning up at jobs that we’d rather leave, always nursing that grass-is-greener-over-there resentment. Well, I’m here to help you see that your ideal job is not only available, but it’s within reach.

Because it’s the job you already have.

[cue scream of brakes and horrified looks]

You see, the reason most of us fantasize at some point about quitting and heading off into the sunset, is because it’s one way – maybe the only way – we can take control of the situation. Or maybe that should be perceived control.


Every time you play the

If only… [I quit this job]… I could… [get a much better job that fulfills all my needs]

you’re giving yourself an excuse for relinquishing control. For not acting. For accepting what is. You are choosing to play victim. And besides, there is a tough love answer: So just quit!

I would suggest there’s an alternative, and it only takes a slight shift in perspective – a reorientation away from victim and towards solution. It takes

If only… [I solved these current frustrations]… I could… [enjoy my work much more]

When we focus on areas we can control, we can make change happen. And it doesn’t have to be earthquake-scale life change either. In my experience coaching and counseling people through change, I’ve found the action domains are pretty consistent:

  • Manager relationship
  • Peer and team conflict
  • Ineffective processes in the wider organization
  • Lack of clarity of how my job fits in
  • Misalignment of strengths with current job

The great news is that, aside from the last one, all of the others are solvable by local action. Doesn’t mean they’re easy – if you’ve had a colleague who consistently brings the team DOWN, you know what I mean – but it does mean you’ve got a greater chance of acting to improve your current job.

Even if you are working towards being the next American Idol, it’s likely you’ll have your job for a while longer. So why not make it

Work you enjoy doing without having to adapt yourself too much.

That sounds much closer to ideal, doesn’t it?

If you want some help working through your unique

If only… I could…

contact me directly. Or, if you know someone who could benefit from this insight, why not refer them – there’s a bonus in it for you if the referral is successful.